I’ve been spending a few days cleaning, organizing and getting rid of (even more!) stuff that I don’t need. During the process, I happened to come across a couple of journals of mine from several years ago. (I love going back and re-reading my old entries; I’m usually in awe of how much I’ve changed and grown, of just how far God has truly brought me.)
So, I came across the writing below and was instantly lost in the memory of when those words first came to me. I remember I was literally at the lowest of my lows and, even though I didn’t necessarily believe (at the time) what He was speaking to me, I wrote it down anyway. But today, as I read those words, I am nothing other than amazed at the incredible transformation He has done in me, at how perfect His strength was & is made in my weakness — and especially how great His love is for me. I’ve read 1 Corinthians 13:13 countless times (“the greatest of these is love”) but I am really just now truly understanding what that actually means. Love changes things, changes people. A person who is deeply loved cannot help but be transformed, even if that person doesn’t realize it at the time. I never knew how much God loved me (and still cannot fully grasp it) — but I know beyond a shadow of any doubt that I’d be lost if He didn’t.
hold your head high.
you are special
and I love you.
dry your tears, my child.
this season of sorrow will not last forever.
remember what it feels like to laugh
and know that your joy is coming in the morning.
relax, little one.
stop trying to go through this on your own
and let me carry you.
your pain is weighing you down
but my burden is light.
that I am making you strong again
and I will give you back what was stolen.
don’t ever forget how much I love you.
everything I do
is because I love you.
I never left you.
I never forgot about you.
all I ever did
was love you.